can it get any worse?

I probably shouldn't blog for all to see while feeling like I'm in the depths of depression. I'm supposed to be bragging about how wonderful the shower was Sunday and all the fabulous gifts we got, but right now all I can focus on is the negative. The day was a disaster. My parents got into a fight that morning and decided to call me and drag me into it. I went to early service and Dr. Gunnells talked about all these stressors in your life and I qualified for every one. Sunday School was about chaos and confusion in your life and boy does that sum up my life pretty well right now. Arthur's sister didn't get to Mobile on time to pick up Arthur's mom for the shower so they arrived at the time it ended. Even after the fight from earlier in the morning, Mom decided to show up at the shower after all. Despite everyone's best efforts to engage her in conversation and include her in what was going on, she chose to sit like a knot on a log throughout the time she actually stayed for the shower. (She ducked out as soon as she got the chance) My best friend since jr high didn't show up and hasn't bothered to respond to the last few emails I've sent much less call to check on me during my spiral down into what at this moment feels like one of the worst times of my life. But to focus on the positive----everyone who was there Sunday did shower me with love and compassion. The gifts were exquisite. The few hostesses who were left at the shower loved Arthur's family and commented on the love they appear to have for me. I've had the last few days to clean the house and prepare it for Arthur's stuff to be moved in, which wouldn't have happened if I had a job. I'm going in a few hours to pick up my wedding dress and make the final decision on my wedding band. I've had plenty of other friends who have taken the time to call and email and check on me in the last few days to make sure I'm "hanging in there". So, know that I really do appreciate all the wonderful things that people have done for me in the last week or so, but that reality sunk in here in the last few days and for one of the few times in my life I'm admitting to everyone that I'm struggling. Someone at church commented Sunday that they knew I was a private person and didn't like to "air" my personal business, but that sometimes I need to so that people will know how to pray and how to help. So, this is my cry for help!